


Twenty Two months

by Iliveinlouisass (Octoberrose11)



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Porn, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby Fic, Bisexual Louis, Bisexual Niall, Blow Jobs, Bottom Louis, Bottom Niall, Cancer, Friends to Lovers, Just hold on is mentioned, Kid Fic, LA, London, M/M, Minor Character Death, More tags to be added, Multi, One Direction Hiatus, Post-Zayn One Direction, Rimming, Slow Burn, Spanking, Subspace, Top Louis, Top Niall, Top bressie, beach, gay Bressie, minor D/s, okay sex tags rip, the slowest slow burn, this fic lasts like over two and a half years, this town is mentioned
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2018-10-27 21:26:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10817067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Octoberrose11/pseuds/Iliveinlouisass
Summary: “Congratulations Niall,” his lawyer says with a slow drawl that reminds him of Harry, “you have your first scandal in almost six years.” The other man sounds completely unamused, and borderline stressed. Niall wonders if he’s paying him enough for the job he does.Niall lets himself sit on the hot sand, scratching at his sun burned and peeling shoulder. “Whatcha mean, mate?”Not even three months into One Direction's hiatus Niall gets news that changes his life forever, and that of two of his best friends.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mercedesinthepool](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercedesinthepool/gifts), [Ziamsrighthand](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ziamsrighthand/gifts).



> Hi, so I know I said I wouldn't be posting anymore WIPs but I've been working on this one in secret since March? Idk Callie could tell you and it's one I'm the most proud of to date, I think. 
> 
> However some things to know before going in:  
> -this is an AU  
> -Jay's cancer and death are mentioned. I have done my best to write this respectfully and to help me deal with my own emotions and my love for Louis and his siblings.  
> -I have done my best to keep my own opinions about fandom things outside of the fic out of the fic.

**\------ March ------**  
The phone call comes while he’s on some island off of the coast of California where’s he’s been spending his time working on solo music, though his exact location is out of reach in his mind from the amount of beer he’s had in the last three hours. He knows he’s close to his house in LA and that he has nothing to do on the other side of the world anytime soon so he glares at the phone in his hand for a moment before he stands with a sigh. “I have got to take this,” he says with a charming smile to the girl sitting next to him. She pouts but he won’t be wavered, he has to take this.  
  
He waves to his group of friends as he walks away from them, answering the phone when he’s sure he won’t be overheard or interrupted. “Can I help you?”  
  
“Congratulations Niall,” his lawyer says with a slow drawl that reminds him of Harry, “you have your first scandal in almost six years.” The other man sounds completely unamused, and borderline stressed. Niall wonders if he’s paying him enough for the job he does.  
  
Niall lets himself sit on the hot sand, scratching at his sun burned and peeling shoulder. “Whatcha mean, mate?”  
  
“A young woman, a Melysa Miles, passed away three days ago and her lawyers have gotten in contact with us mate. She has a daughter and she listed you as the father, you’re due in London in two days for a DNA test and hopefully we can hide this under the rug.”  
  
“This isn’t a scandal,” Niall forces a laugh, “we have claims like this all the time.” If a woman claiming one of the five of them was the father of their baby was a scandal then their lawyers would never get anything productive done, ever.  
  
The older man hums in agreement, “That’s usually the case, yes, but you actually slept with this one. We have a record of her signing a non disclosure agreement and being given a couple thousand pounds before she was sent on her way.” The older man sighs, and would have continued on but Niall cut him off.  
  
“Still not seeing the scandal here, can we hurry this conversation up?” He doesn’t mean to sound cross but he’s a little inpatient and wanting to get back to his friends and the beer, and the woman he can see making her way toward them in the tiniest bikini he’s ever seen.  
  
His lawyer sighs, “London. Forty eight hours. DNA test. Otherwise the state says they’ll move foreword and place her into foster care, and mate, rumor has it she looks just like you.”  
  
Niall swallows a groan, making fists in the sand. He has to stop and think, mentally rearranging his schedule for the next week or two. “I have a writing session tomorrow morning,” he says slowly, “that I can’t cancel, but I can be on the next flight out.”  
  
His lawyer agrees, promising that he’ll have Niall’s personal assistant arrange Niall’s flight and a car to pick him up from the airport when he lands. The lawyer recommends not telling anyone why he’s making a mad dash to London, and that it would be better off if he didn’t mention what was going on to anyone, until his rep could come up with a good explanation if the DNA test showed that they matched.  
  
They hang up and Niall stands up, shaking the sand off his hands and shorts. He’s going to have to come up with a good excuse for his friends on why he’s bailing early tonight, he thinks, walking back over. He’s not sure what wants the possibility of him being a father to come out, true or not. If he really is the girl’s father he won’t try to hide it, won’t be ashamed of his past self but.  
  
Louis is in the middle of his own baby drama and Niall sees the way it weighs the older man down, whether he’d admit it or not. He knows Liam is about to go into his own baby drama, management forcing his hand too (way to early), and knows on some level that coming out now would be easier then hiding it. He’s seen Louis go through it, seen the way Liam never comments on anything and knows that it makes his older two band mates tired, beyond exhausted at having to keep up pretenses at all times. They’re never fully relaxed, never fully themselves.  
  
But he’s the baby of the band, even if Harry really is the youngest out of the five. The others do their best to protect him, even when he can handle things on his own. Maybe this, when the truth all comes out, will show them just how grown up he really is.  
  
Maybe, he thinks, he can actually do this on his own and once and for all show just how responsible he can be.  
  
^*^*^*^*^*

  
When he arrives in London it’s 2pm of the day he legally had to be there, and his PA, Jex, yells at him as they walk through the airport together. He’s pushing it, she tells him, visiting hours at the center end at 5pm sharp and with London traffic they’ll be lucky to make it in time. She adds, as a side note, that even if they’re late it’s not like he has to meet the little girl today, they’re just there for a DNA test after all, and assures him not to stress about it. Personally he thinks she’s stressing enough for the two of them, but wisely keeps his mouth shut.  
  
He does his best to ignore her, the way he always does, even though he knows Jex has his best interest at heart. He’s still not sure he’s really the little girl’s father, is the thing, and he’d rather not get his hopes up either way.  
  
He tells her as much in the car, Basil behind the wheel. Jex rolls her eyes at him and Niall is sure that if they’d been alone she would have slapped him upside the back of the head at her full strength, though Basil would laugh instead of coming to his defense.  
  
“Stop being a fucking smart ass,” she tells him, London traffic speeding along beside them. “If she isn’t yours, she isn’t yours. It’s not like you won’t have other opportunities to make a kid.” She sends him a wicked smile. “Or practice making them with your band mates.”  
  
He goes bright red, even as Basil dies cackling from the front seat. He regrets telling her anything, he thinks as he wishes he could disappear. Or better yet, he wishes he could fire Jex but she’s the best there is, is still single and doesn’t mind flying around the world with him at the drop of the hat.  
  
“I’m sleeping until we get there,” he announces, closing his eyes. “Wake me up when we arrive, and not a second before.”  
  
Jex laughs, “Don’t worry, hun, I’m sure you’ll wake up before we even arrive.”  
  
He grumbles under his breath, making a pillow against the window with a hoodie he finds under his feet, before curling up in a ball. Jex opens her mouth to say something else but he shoots her a glare, and puts his ear buds in his ears blaring a song he’s been working on as loud as he can on repeat.  
  
^*^*^*^*^*  
  
Aoife looks like him, is the first thing he notices in a sort of dissociated kind of way. Or, at least, she looks like a female baby Theo who looked like him according to everyone in the world.  
  
Basil is behind him, leaning against the wall and doing his best to look intimidating. Niall would roll his eyes if he felt better, and wasn’t so jet lagged. His body guard, when Niall or the others aren’t in danger, is the biggest fluff ball in the world. Niall knows that as soon as Aoife is within Basil’s eye site the other man will be like putty in her little hands, Niall’s daughter or not the man has a weakness for little kids.  
  
He stares at her as her social worker brings her in the room, the young woman bouncing her on her hip as Aoife whines out, “mama mama mama,” and squirms, demanding to be put down even as her social worker is shifting her, preparing to lower her down.  
  
“No, Aoife,” the woman scolds, tightening her hands so Aoife doesn’t fall face first.  
  
Her big blue eyes stare distrustfully up at him, or as much as a two year old can look suspiciously at anyone, as her social worker places her in his arms, her pale blonde hair in tiny braids sticking out from the back of her head, wearing a pink Elmo onesie with little pink boots on her feet.  
  
She’s fucking adorable.  
  
He decides then that she’s precious and that he would do anything in the world to protect her from anything and everything, even his own fame.  
  
“Your lawyer said that you would be wanting a DNA test done, Mr. Horan?” the social worker, Anna, says. She has a smile on her face, though it seems fake to Niall and Lord knows he has enough practice to know what is real and fake anymore.  
  
He stares back into Aoife’s eyes, heart clinching when she wraps a fist around his pointer finger. “There’s no need,” it comes out a croak, “there’s no denying she’s mine.” Not when his own face is staring back at him.  
  
Anna smiles, a real one this time. “Well in that case I’ll leave you alone to spend some time bonding with your daughter.” She looks at the clock and frowns. “We’re supposed to have closed five minutes ago,” she tells him, “but we can make an exception for you, just this once.” Her eyes crinkle up as she smiles, “Just as long as you don’t tell anyone, enjoy your time with her, okay?”  
  
Niall’s mostly sure he said thank you, not so sure that Anna left the room after that, his whole world narrowing down to the little girl in his arms and the way she played with his fingers as she babbled to herself.  
  
“I’m your dad,” he tells her softly, pressing a kiss to her tiny hands. “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you ever again. Not me, not the world, I’ll fight them all if I have to.”  
  
Her frown moves up in a smile, deep dimples appearing in her still baby fat rounded cheeks. It’s a start, he thinks pressing a kiss to the side of her head. It’s a start.  
  
^*^*^*^*^*

  
The next twenty-four hours are as exhausting as he had expected them to be. He has the hardest time leaving Aoife with her foster mom, but Niall has to set up her bedroom and get a car seat before they’ll let her come home with him.  
  
He would love to call one of the other boys, just to get some help calming his nerves as he stands outside the store preparing to buy a bunch of shit to make a little girl bedroom. Hell, he’d call Zayn if he thought the other boy would answer.  
  
Niall has never been around little girls much, is the thing. He’s the youngest of two, only has an older brother while the other boys could start a decent sized soccer team if all of their sisters armed together. The only little girls he’s spent any amount of time with are Brooklyn and Lux (who prefer Zayn, and Harry and Louis respectfully) and while they liked Niall just fine and would even interact with him and play with him, but he never spent long periods of time one on one with them. There was always someone there to act as a buffer.  
  
Which is why as he stands outside of the department store he wonders again what the hell he got himself into with agreeing to take her. He knows nothing about little girls, especially not traumatized little girls who just lost their mom.  
  
He knows, thanks to Anna, that Aoife has a deep love for the Disney show Doc Mcstuffins, almost to the point of it being an obsession, and figures that starting there might be the best place.  
  
He nods to himself and heads inside, finding the Disney area with no problem, though finding the Doc Mcstuffins specific area takes a bit longer. He keeps getting distracted, is the thing, and seriously thinks on just having a personal shopper pick up the things he needs but shakes the idea away. If anyone picks out the things for his daughter’s bedroom it’s going to be him.  
  
Even if it’s fucking exhausting.  
  
Three hours later he’s decided that Doc Mcstuffins is the devil. Everything is pink, blue and purple and he’s terrified to force gender roles on his daughter but she likes this TV show and if she hates it in six months well, he can go buy her a whole new room. (He hopes she hates it in two, the lamb looks really suspicious and he might be a little terrified of it.)  
  
Her two pillow cases say, “best cuddler” with said lamb and he ignores the way the cashier side eyes him when he pushes them as far away from his person while waiting to pay. That thing is creepy, okay? He’s not going to apologize for being freaked out by it.  
  
It dawns on him that there’s a chance he could be papped carrying all this shit to his house and he really doesn’t want the news to break that way. If, or better yet when, he decides to share the news of his daughter it will be on his time, and it will be his decision, not some asshole pap who doesn’t know how to mind their own business.  
  
When he quietly asks the manager if he could include the rest of his packages to be delivered with his order of the bed and chest of drawers and mirrors she agrees with a smile, and offers him the chance to come by after hours the next day if he finds there’s something he found out he missed. He can see the curiosity in her eyes, can tell that there’s a million questions she’s dying to ask but she keeps herself professional, so her thanks her and says he might take her up on that but he has a lot to do between now and then.  
  
He calls Anna as he leaves, hoping she’ll pick up.  
  
“This is Anna,” she finally says as he’s sliding into the car, sunglasses secure on his face.  
  
“Hi Anna, this is Niall Horan, Aoife’s father.”  
  
“Hello Niall,” he can hear the smile in her voice, “are you wanting to check up on Aoife then? Because I can assure you she’s fine, but I can try to get her to talk to you on the phone if it will make you feel better.”  
  
He shifts, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. He’s her father so he should know this yet he doesn’t. He knows basically nothing about his own child, and suddenly he feels about two inches tall. “I’m in town picking up clothes and shoes, and a car seat for Aoife but,” his cheeks go red, “I wasn’t sure how much she weighs or what size clothes to get her.”  
  
Anna hums thoughtfully, “I guess that’s the one thing we didn’t go over yesterday, isn’t it? Tell you what, why don’t you stop by sometime today and we can sort everything out.”  
  
Niall holds back a sigh knowing he has a lot to do before she comes over tomorrow to check up on his house, but agrees. If he can get the damn car seat situation figured out he could have Aoife home, for good, tomorrow and as he hangs up the phone and checks behind him to pull out of his parking spot, the thought fills him with joy.  
  
^*^*^*^*^*  
  
A week and a half later he isn’t filled with as much joy, beyond exhausted, though he’s still delighted to be a father. Anna had stopped by occasionally the first couple of days, mostly so Aoife could get used to having a home with her dad. But it’s been a week just the two of them and getting to know each other.  
  
It’s been a week of ignoring everyone’s phone calls, of lying to Bressie (and his da!) about why he’s back in London, and then has to lie more about when he’s going to be flying back to LA, or even worse lie about why he doesn’t fly home to Ireland while he’s in London. He’s even put the boys group chat on silent, not wanting to see their burning questions.  
  
He knows that it isn’t going to buy him much time, that one of the boys will show up, or send Bressie, to find out what’s wrong with him but it’s hard to want to share Aoife with the world just yet. He’s still learning what makes her tick, and she’s still getting used to his presence. They’re still learning to be a family of two and Niall isn’t ready for their glass ball to shatter just yet.  
  
He’s noticed that she doesn’t talk much, and worried that maybe there was something wrong with her, had called Anna forty-eight hours after he’s brought her home wanting to know if it was normal. Anna had laughed and said her mom, Melysa, probably hadn’t talked to her much, if at all. She had hurried on to assure him that since she’s walking fine, and can say some words and since she’s a healthy weight that it’s obvious she hadn’t been neglected or abused so he shouldn’t worry, but Niall wasn’t so sure.  
  
She can say mama, juice, baba (for bottle, he assumes), baby (for herself), and ball. And though he’s really happy she hasn’t yet learned how to use the word “no” sometimes she babbles it under her breath when she’s supposed to be napping. He wants to be impressed, his daughter is talking! Something he helped make is walking and talking and being a little human yet he knows, from doing some google searches, that she should be saying so many more.  
  
He would love nothing more then to call Jay, or even Louis, and ask them for advice and how to teach her to talk more, knows neither would judge him and sometimes at night he’ll even pick up the phone to start to call but in the end he doesn’t. Even better though, he would love nothing more then to call his own mom and tell her everything thats going on, and how he fucked up and needed her, but knew that was out of the question before the thought could fully cross his mind. He hasn’t spoken with his ma since Greg’s wedding, maybe Theo’s Baptism, but it’s been years. He has nothing left to say to her.  
  
He drowns another cup of coffee, debates pouring another one when his front door opens. Niall isn’t that concerned, honestly he isn’t, even as he prepares to use his coffee mug as a weapon.  
  
“Oi Nialler! Where the fuck are you?”  
  
Niall holds back a groan, of course they would send Louis. Of course they would. Better to get this over with before Aoife wakes up and comes looking for him. “I’m in the kitchen Louis!”  
  
“Good,” there’s the sound of Louis kicking off his shoes before his footsteps head Niall’s way, “then you can make me a cup of tea.” He turns the corner and Niall takes his fill of the older man, having to force his face to stay neutral.  
  
Louis looks tired, is the first thing he notices. The second thing is that it appears that Louis has lost even more weight since the last time he saw him (back in December, he thinks, not longer after the Triple Ho Show). Louis looks like the smallest wind could knock him over. He notices with a laugh that Louis is doing the same look over with him, a smile lighting up his face before he opens his arms for a hug.  
  
“Well lad, are you going to hug me or not?” He demands, before pulling Niall into a hug. “Fucking hell, it’s good to see you.”  
  
“Good to see you too,” Niall says pulling away. “You still want some tea?”  
  
Louis raises an eye brow at him, even as he hops on the counter closest to the stove. “Now lad, when have you ever known me not to want tea?”  
  
Niall keeps it to himself but he can remember several instances that Louis didn’t want tea, and even went as far as turning it down when it was offered. For instance the day he and Harry had a huge fight back in 2012, the two weeks that followed Zayn leaving the band, when Jay had the baby twins prematurely, the morning they lost the X Factor and well, looking back Niall can think of even more instances but he’d rather not fight with Louis this morning.  
  
(Or ever, but Niall knows thats unrealistic.)  
  
“Anyway,” Louis continues even as he watches Niall carefully make him a cup of tea, “me and the others are worried about you, Nialler.” His face drops into a frown, “Liam even called Zayn,” he scrunches his face up in fake disgust, “to see if he’d heard from you.”  
  
Niall hops up next to him, his own cup of tea in his hands. “So you drew the short end of the stick and had to come check up on me, huh? Make sure I wasn’t dead.” He can’t help sounding bitter, and a little hurt.  
  
“Niall, you know I didn’t mean it like that,” Louis almost drops his tea in his haste to reassure Niall, “Honestly me and the other lads had a fight to see who would come check up on you.” He shrugs. “It’s just, you seemed to be enjoying your time in LA so much and then you randomly decided to come home to London and won’t tell anyone why!” He raises his voice on the last sentence, shouting in a way he usually doesn’t with Niall.  
  
“Louis,” he sets his cup down and reaches out for Louis’ hand. “Mate, you know I trust you more then anything.”  
  
“Then why the fuck won’t you talk to me?” The tea actually splashes over this time as Louis continues to gesture madly, “I tell you everything!”  
  
Niall winces, finally taking the cup of tea from Louis. “Love, can you stop shouting please?” He’s not above begging, remembering that Aoife is still asleep in her bedroom down the hall.  
  
Louis opens his mouth, no doubt to continue shouting, when the sound of footsteps comes from behind them. Once again Niall wishes the ground would open up and swallow him.  
  
“You could have told me you had someone over, you dog.” Louis wiggles his eye brows at Niall. “It’s been forever since you had your last girlfriend.”  
  
Niall sighs, “You know it isn’t as easy as that.” He turns his attention back to the doorway where Aoife has appeared, tiny fists rubbing at still sleepy eyes. He can hear Louis’ sharp inhale, but Niall does his best to ignore him. “Hey baby girl,” he says gently, “did you sleep well?”  
  
“Yes.” She walks over and pulls on his pant legs before raising her arms in a silent plea to be picked up, making a pleased noise when he lifts her before snuggling into his shoulder.  
  
“Uh oh,” Louis’ voice is sing songy. “Looks like Nialler has some explaining to do.” His eyes are wide, and sharp, Niall knows they are even if he can’t see them himself.  
  
Niall would love to be mad, is the thing, would love more then anything to demand that Louis leave and pretend he never saw anything but Niall isn’t ashamed of his daughter, and the plan wasn’t to hide her away forever. And isn’t it better to introduce her to someone who loves kids and doesn’t have anything against her to start with.  
  
Again, she looks just like Niall. He knows, just knows, that Louis got a good look at her face before she was picked up, knows that Louis has to know that they’re related, if not that Niall is her father. If he was a lesser man he’d consider laughing it off and explaining that she’s Theo’s little sister, isn’t she gorgeous? But he isn’t.  
  
He lets himself sigh, though, before turning to reface Louis, who makes the soft sound he always makes when faced with a baby. “Lou, this is my daughter Aoife,” he gentles his voice, “and Aoife this is your Uncle Louis, da and him are in a band together.”  
  
Aoife turns to look at Louis, her blue eyes wide and unblinking. Niall knows, from having been on the other side of the stare that it’s unnerving. A two year old should not be able to stare into your soul the way she does, should not be able to appear like she can tell your darkest and most personal secrets from the very first moment that she meets you.  
  
Louis blinks at her, before offering her his pinky. “Hello doll,” he says, smiling when she wraps her tiny fist around his finger, “you can call me Lou.”  
  
Aoife shrugs, and squirms to be put down, before wobbling her way back to her bedroom. The two men watch her go, Louis obviously holding in the noises he wants to make until she’s out of eye sight.  
  
“Mate.”  
  
Niall sighs, “I know.”  
  
“Mate.”  
  
“I know.”  
  
“Feel like explaining then, young Neil?” Louis’ eyes are still on the doorway that she had just disappeared through, lips lifted in a smile he doesn’t seem to know he’s making.  
  
So he briefly explains, keeping his voice quiet in the hopes that Aoife doesn’t over hear. Though he knows that she won’t understand if she does, Niall never wants her to feel like- to ever even consider- that Niall didn’t love her, didn’t want her.  
  
Louis crosses his arms half way through the explanation, eye brows disappearing into his fringe. He lets Niall finish before he slaps him on the back of the head. “What the fuck Niall!”  
  
“Hey!” Niall slaps him back, before wrapping his arms around himself. “Go on, get out whatever you want to yell at me about.”  
  
Louis takes in the way Niall has collapsed in on himself, arms cradling himself in an attempt to self comfort, and his anger leaves him. “I’m not going to yell at you, lad.” He sighs, “I just don’t understand why you felt like you couldn’t tell us this.” He waves his hand, “Yes I understand that you wanted time alone with her but you could have told us that!”  
  
“Would you have listened?” Niall questions sharply. “Because I know you boys and you’d be over here before I could even finish hitting send.”  
  
“It’s better then letting me think you’d killed yourself! Hell Niall, I thought when I came in today I’d find you dead.” Louis’ voice breaks and even as angry as he is Niall can’t help but comfort him.  
  
They sway back and forth in the hug Niall pulls him into, neither bothering to pretend that Louis isn’t crying.  
  
Louis doesn’t cry in front of people often, if ever. Niall can remember him crying in front of them when Zayn announced he was leaving the band, any maybe one time besides that, in all the years he’s known him. Louis is always pretty to the point that he should be worshiped and loved, but watching Louis cry is a religious experience that Niall wishes he could go back and never have seen.  
  
Kind of like if Mother Mary appeared in front of him and told him he could never drink again, Louis crying is the kind of bad omen that you never want to see.  
  
Still Niall holds him as tight as he can until the storm passes.  
  
**\------ April ------**  
  
Having Louis in the know changes Niall’s life in ways he never could have imagined. For one, Louis is over more then he isn’t which means Niall doesn’t have to try and find a babysitter. It’s also nice in the fact that he can run interference with Niall’s da and the other boys when the need arises.  
  
On the other hand it means that Louis somehow managed to talk him into letting Bressie into his house. Niall never knew he needed to see the older man holding his daughter but with Louis leaning against Bressie’s shoulder and Bressie leaning down smiling into Aoife’s face, Niall’s chest hurts.  
  
Bressie learns the best way to make Aoife laugh, Louis showing him how to gently tie bows in her hair and how to use his gentle hands to do braids and buns. Niall has to look away, the images doing something to his heart.  
  
“Can you say Bressie?” Louis asks her, voice sing songy and happy in a way it only gets when he’s talking to children.  
  
Aoife laughs at them, slaps her little baby hands against Bressie’s cheeks making the other two men laugh.  
  
His worlds are colliding together in ways he never could have imagined even four months ago.  
  
Of course, all goods things have to come to an end eventually.  
  
Bressie has to go back to Ireland and do things Bressie does when he isn’t harassing Niall, and Louis has to go back to LA and do whatever it is that Louis is doing in America (Niall has him explain it once, but can’t remember exactly what it is, Aoife laughing distracting him.)  
  
And Niall goes back to recording his solo album, Jex babysitting Aoife while he works during the day, and then Niall taking over at night, taking delight in the things his baby girl has learned durning the day.  
  
Things are at peace, finally. He’s happy. He has a family. He’s going to tell the boys, and his da. He has a routine down, and Aoife loves him, and calls him daddy more often then not.  
  
Then May comes.  
  
**\------ May ------**  
  
It’s not unusual for the boy’s group chat to go off first thing in the morning for Niall anymore, with them all in different time zones and having different recording hours. Aoife is still asleep thankfully so he rolls over and takes his time to get his phone.  
  
Which he drops in shock.  
  
He has over ninety notifications in his group chat with the boys, the majority of which seem to be from Harry. He scrolls as far back as he can and begins reading.  
  
_Haz (7:09am): Louis just called_  
_Haz (7:10am): found out Jay has leukemia_  
_Haz (7:10am): not sure treatment will work_  
_Haz (7:11am): it isn’t good_  
_Haz (7:11am): Lottie can’t find him_  
_Liam (7:12am): where is he? Is anyone with him?_  
_Zayn (7:13am): He was out in LA the last I heard from him_  
_Liam (7:14am): Haven’t seen him in a couple of weeks, thought he was headed out to see Haz last I heard_  
_Haz (7:15am): I thought he was headed out to see Zayn?_  
_Zayn (7:16am): No? I thought he was with Niall?_  
   
Niall’s door bell goes off at that very moment and he holds back a sigh even as he types back a, think he’s with me lads, and goes to open his door. He’s not surprised to find Louis on the other side, eyes and cheeks a deep red, like he’s been crying hard again.  
  
Louis smiles at him, or does his best to smile. “Hey Nialler, mind if I come in?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cw for suicide

Hey friends, sorry if you opened this and expected a chapter (I promise it's coming tomorrow or on Sunday). I just thought I'd post this (and delete it when I post the next chapter) to apologize for the long wait on an update. 

This year has been literal hell since April. 

My mom fell and shattered her elbow in April and she's had four surgeries since then. I started a new job to help try and pay for some of that which is good because in August she got a serious infection and was in the hospital for two and a half weeks and almost died. Between those times we almost lost my aunt once, my cousin has tried to kill herself at school twice, my cousin has announced that she's divorcing her husband, my grandma has been in the hospital- anyways the list is never ending. 

Thank you to all of you who've kept up with me on twitter and tumblr and offered thoughts and prayers. I'm downing a bunch of soda tonight to try and update to apologize for the delay. The chapter for twenty two months is finished, just needs to be edited, zouis fics will be updated next. 

That said please don't think any of these fics have been abandoned. I've been screaming at friends for months about the ideas I have and how excited I am to write the next part. I just haven't really had time to do so. Rip

Anyways I hope this finds all of you well and thank you again for all of your patience. 

All the love,   
Lee


	3. Chapter 3

\------ May (continued) ------

Niall doesn’t ask questions the first few hours Louis is there. He allows the older man to wake up Aoife, who screams, “Ouie!” when she sees him. Louis talks to her in a soft voice, the way he always talks to little kids but softer still because it’s Aoife.

Niall slides his phone from hand to hand, debating on if he should call in reinforcements by means of the others or if this is something he should handle himself. It should be an easy choice, really, it’s always been the five of them against the world, a merry band of brothers if there’s ever been one, but something stops him this time.

Maybe it’s the hard set of Louis’ shoulders, curved in to make himself smaller, or the way his jaw is clenched even as he gently plays with Aoife’s fingers and presses kisses to the side of her head.

Maybe still it’s the way Louis’ hands shake when he lifts up a cup of tea with his right hand, the left holding on while he follows Aoife to her room, shakily smiling at her while she babbles in a toddler language no one besides she can understand even as he nods in head in agreement.

“Is that right?”

Aoife’s smile could split her face in half from the way she beams up at him, a feeling Niall understands all too well, the way the whole world narrows down when Louis focuses all his attention on you.

His phone vibrates in his hand and he shakes his musings about Louis off and checks to see who it is.

It’s the group chat, because of course it is. Apparently Liam and Harry are fighting about if they should come down or not, from what Niall can read from the last few texts at any rate.

Haz (9:15am): he’s for sure with Niall though  
Liam (9:16am): lou would still appreciate us being there.  
Zayn (9:16am): i agree with harry  
Liam: (9:17am): do you ever not agree with Harry  
Haz: (9:18am): focus  
Haz: (9:19am): lou is with niall and niall will call us in if he needs us

The group chat goes quiet for a few minutes and then:

Zayn (9:27am): you’re both acting like Jay’s already dead and that’s going to help no one  
Zayn: (9:28am): @Niall if you or Lou need anything let me know babes, I’ll be in LA on Friday

Zayn Malik has left the group chat

Niall sighs, his fingers hesitating before he sends a message, first in the group chat and then to Zayn, Aoife laughing in the background at something Louis says to her.

Niall: (9:30am): Lou’s here, don’t come. Gonna try to convince him to take a nap

And adds in a text to just Zayn:

 

Niall: (9:31am): come around over the weekend when you’re in town if you want. think I have some explaining to do and Lou would love to see you

He puts his phone on silent and goes to rejoin Aoife and Louis in the living room, snorting as he rounds the corner. Aoife somehow has managed to get her hands on the rubber things Niall uses to put her hair up, but even more surprising she’s managed to find the baby hairbrush Niall uses to brush her hair and has gone to work on putting Louis’ up. There’s also a few tubes of chapstick that Niall’s known to carry around in his pockets, though God knows where she found those at. 

Louis smiles up at him from where he’s sitting on the floor, before wincing when Aoife tugs a little too hard. “Gentle love, remember what Louis told you.”

Aoife nods, “Sorry,” she lisps out, barely understandable but the fact she tried makes Niall fell a swell of affection for Louis building in his chest.

“That’s okay love,” Louis soothes, reaching behind him and taking hold of her hand. “But I think we’re done playing beauty school for now.”

Aoife nods and allows herself to be pulled into Louis’ arms, her small hands rubbing against his facial hair, curious and laughing like it tickles but continues to do it anyways. Louis lets her, face gentle, eyes crinkled up like they do only when he’s the happiest.

And Niall doesn’t understand why Louis is here in his house in LA, doesn’t understand why he didn’t fly home the moment he got the news about Jay, doesn’t understand why he isn’t with his sisters and his mom but he isn’t going to ask. Niall knows when Louis showed up he looked moments from falling apart, looked like if pushed hard enough he’d shatter into a million pieces but the longer he spends sitting on the floor with Aoife, and the longer he spends watching Niall watch him the more his shoulders relax, and the more the smile on his face becomes real.

\------ ^ ------

He manages to convince Louis to go lay down when he bribes Louis to take Aoife with him, begs him to help him get her to sleep even though he thinks Louis knows he could do it himself if he really wanted to (he doesn’t, everything is easier when Louis helps.) 

For as long as Louis has been in his life Niall has never managed to find a way to express how much easier everything is when he’s around. Louis was the one who stayed with him the most after his knee surgeries, he’s the one who made him laugh the first concert after he fucked them up again even though he rather would have cried before they even hit half way through the concert.

Life is just easier and more fun when Louis is around.

And watching right now put on a brave face, pretending like nothing was bothering him and that everything was just fine and dandy was hard. But he knew that this was the way Louis functioned.

In a couple of hours, when Aoife is asleep, Louis will finally break and admit everything that he’s thinking and feeling. And it may not be to Niall, honestly it probably won’t be, but he likes to think that Louis knows that he’s there if he needs him.

His phone vibrates in his hand, startling him. Louis smirks over his shoulder, as if he knew Niall had gotten lost staring at his ass. The phone is still vibrating in his hand, much to his dismay. The name on the display has him taking a deep breath before he walks out of the room to answer it.

“Hey Lottie.”

There’s a sniffle on the other side of the phone and Niall’s heart breaks a little. Lottie has always been his favorite one direction sister and to see her suffering, to see all of the Tomlinson-Deakin family suffering, is a special hell all on it’s own. “Niall, babe, please tell me he’s with you.” Her voice cracks on the ‘he’. “He’s not answering his phone, not even for mum, no one can get a hold of him and I’m so fucking scared.”

Niall feels a moment of anger for Louis, but he pushes it down. He’s suffering at the moment too, after all. “Yeah babe, he’s here. He arrived at my house a couple of hours ago. He’s hanging out with- well, I was going to tell you in person but I’ve got a daughter, her name is Aoife and she and Louis are currently doing a puzzle in her bedroom. I’m sorry he’s not answering his phone though, you want me to go ask him to call you back?”

She breaks down in relieved sobs, and once again Niall’s heart shatters. “No, no that’s okay, thank you though. I’m just glad- I’m just glad he’s okay.” She lets out another sob before quickly saying a goodbye and disconnecting the call.

Niall blinks at his phone for a moment before shaking it off. It buzz’s in his hand again and for a moment he contemplates throwing it across the room and sags in relief when he sees it’s just a text from Zayn sending him confirmation for his flight the following weekend.

“Hey Louis?” He doesn’t wait for a response before he continues. “I’m going to go get some air for a moment, you okay with Aoife for a little while?”   
“Sure babe!” Louis appears in the doorway, Aoife on his hip. “The two of us will be fine while daddy is gone, won’t we darling?” He pretends to bite her hand again, his eyes crinkling up in a real smile when she laughs.

Niall nods to himself, kicking some shoes onto his feet. “I’ll pick up some ice cream from the connivence store down the street,” he offers. “Need some more cigs while I’m there?”

Louis pats his pocket down and shakes his head when he finds a nearly full pack. “Nah, mate, this should hold me over for a while.”

Niall presses a kiss to the side of Aoife’s head and then does the same to Louis after a pause to contemplate what he’s doing. “I’ll be back in a little while then, you know where all the emergency numbers are though I doubt you’ll need them for as long as I’m going to be gone. Bressie might ring, I’m not sure, but you know the passcode to unlock my laptop if you have to. If she gets bored just throw on that demonic show she likes so much, she’s not allowed to watch it when I’m here. Bye you two!”

The las thing Niall hears before the door closes is the sound of Louis’ cackling laughter. He shakes his head with a smile, pulling his hood down over his forehead. He’d hate to get recognized with the state he looks right now.

*^*^*^

For the first time since Louis got the news he’s alone with his thoughts. Well, mostly alone with his thoughts if you don’t count the toddler currently attached to his leg. He’s never been one who’s good at silence, or good at one being alone with just his thoughts for company so he’s desperate for anything that can make some noise, something that can help him keep his mind off the fact that his mom is sick.

He finds that Aoife is already looking up at him with a cheeky grin, something that she has to have inherited from Niall. “Alright lovely, what would you like to do?” He asks her, already knowing that she can’t, or won’t, answer him. Doesn’t yet have the language skills to do so.

He’s suprised when she does answer though, by letting a large fart against his hip, her diaper growing heavy. “Oh shit darling, that is nasty though, isn’t it?”

She laughs at him, but helpfully stays still while he takes her to her bedroom to be changed, and doesn’t even wiggle when he wipes her down with a cold wipe.

“Alright, are you hungry?” She shakes her head. “Do you want to take a bath?” Another head shake.

“‘Amby?” She asks, sounding really sad.

“I’m sorry darling, Louis doesn’t know what that is.” He really is sorry about it, used to being able to understand and give his sibling everything they ever asked for even before they could really speak.

“‘Amby?” She asks again, wiggling to be let down. He watches as she toddles to her bed and picks up the lamb pillow. “‘Amby!” She shows it to him with a proud smile.

He understands now. “Would you like to watch the TV show that scares your daddy then?” He lets out another snort of a laugh. “Fair enough.” He picks her up and takes her to the living room, turning on the Doc Mcstuffins dvd much to her delight.

When Niall comes home forty five minutes later it’s to both of them asleep on the couch, Louis’ hand on Aoife’s back to keep her from rolling off and her little hand tightly holding on to his shirt, like she’s scared he’d go if she didn’t hold on.

**Author's Note:**

> you can come talk to me on tumblr! Ot5trashno1 :)


End file.
